Getting Through A Day

I feel like this was my fault. For anyone who doesn’t know, my knee has been locked for six months. I have very little movement in it, which is from a bucket handle tear in the cartilage, CRPS and my hamstring. I’ve been trying to flex my knee as much as possible and- when I’m laying down on my bed- I think I can now bend it slightly more. This is probably the most progress I’ve made in 6months. However… I then took it too far. I pushed my knee to bend further than it realistically can. I knew it was a mistake the moment I did.

My alarm goes off at 6am and I feel on thing: pain. The pain in my leg was agonising. It felt like bricks were being slammed into my toes, top of my foot, shin, knee and thigh. The pain then rippled through my leg. I tried to move my leg around and ease the pain but it didn’t work. I then took a codeine tablet. The pain was so intense that I ended up wriggling around my bed. It did get better but was still pretty bad so I took another pain killer.

By the time I went into work, the pain was better but I was definitely having side effects from the tables. I had a few minor problems to sort out with the class but nothing major. However, I nearly started to cry in front of the children. I think it was from a mix of side effects and being mentally wiped from the pain attack. Luckily my TA came back into class and I went to the staffroom to calm down. I did manage to teach for the rest of the day but it was hard.

I think I need to be better at knowing when I can go into work after having a pain attack and when I can’t. I think it depends on its duration and when it was- I seem to cope better when the attack happened at night and I can go back to sleep but that could change.

On a positive note, I did get through the day and I hope tomorrow will be better.

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